you were only waiting for this moment to arise

I stole this idea from Mary.  Yup, straight from her blog.  But I though it was a neato thing to do. So, if my life goes as I would like it to, this should be read at the very beginning of my last year in college (as long as I don't decide to pursue any schooling beyond 4 years).   Well, assuming I'm still attempting to blog and it's not just once a year.  However, even if it's once a year this would still be interesting.

The following is a time capsule of my life thus far.

Name: Katri

Nick Names: Katpee

Age: a ripe 24

Current Favorite's Playlist Includes:

Black Bird

Any Florence And The Machine

Hooked on a Feeling

Fat Bottomed Girls

Mean, that darn Taylor Swift..

WHAT BOOK ARE YOU READING? just started Mary Called Magdalene, just finished The Book of Ruth

WHAT TIME IS IT NOW? 1:45, I'm at Timothy's of Colorado in Wheat Ridge:)

WHAT'S ON YOUR MOUSE PAD? I don't have one, but I'm typing this on Mary's macbook. Wooo!

FAVOURITE BOARD GAME? shoot. Scrabble, of course

FAVOURITE MAGAZINE? Well, Vogue...but sometimes I'd just rather look at an Instyle or Glamour

BABIES? Nevs and Luny

FAVOURITE SMELL? Hmm, probably the smell of my baseball glove

WORST FEELING IN THE WORLD?  When I wake up at 3:00am convinced someone is going to murder me.

FIRST THING YOU THINK OF IN THE MORNING? I wasn't murdered! Thanks, Rudolf. 

HOW MANY RINGS BEFORE YOU ANSWER THE PHONE? At work, one.  Uhh, on my phone, I answer when I see someone I want to talk to is calling

FUTURE CHILD'S NAME? Gross....but, for a girl, Esther.  Estie for short.

FAVOURITE COLOUR? Greens

WHAT IS MOST IMPORTANT IN YOUR LIFE? My family, getting through school successfully.

FAVOURITE FOOD! Hmmm, corn dogs or good sushi. 

IF YOU COULD PLAY AN INSTRUMENT, WHAT WOULD IT BE? Bad ass violinist.

DO YOU LIKE TO DRIVE FAST? No, I liket to be able to take my time when I'm going places.

SLEEP WITH A STUFFED ANIMAL? Ya, Rudolf just got taken out of retirement a couple of days ago. 

WHAT TYPE WAS YOUR FIRST CAR? 2001 Toyota Corolla.  Still drive it.  

WHO IS THE PERSON FROM YOUR PAST YOU WISH YOU COULD GO BACK AND TALK TO?  I think, probably all of my grandparents.

FAVOURITE ALCOHOLIC DRINK? Strong Bow, or that other kind of cider I can't remember right now.

DO YOU EAT THE STEMS OF BROCCOLI? I didn't realize there was an option. 

IF YOU COULD HAVE ANY JOB YOU WANTED WHAT WOULD IT BE?  Man, own my own business, a book store.

EVER BEEN IN LOVE?  I've loved.

GLASS HALF EMPTY OR HALF FULL? Full, my friend.  Always.

FAVOURITE MOVIE?  Man, Away We Go, PS I love you, Home Alone, many more...but, that'll do

DO YOU TYPE WITH YOUR FINGERS ON THE RIGHT KEYS? Yes, yes. I do. 

WHAT'S UNDER YOUR BED? An album of Matt stuff.  I don't know why I put it there.  I guess I'm not ready to throw it away, yet. 

WHAT IS YOUR GREATEST AMBITION? Attend DU.  Own my own business.  Be blissfully happy and proud of my life.

WHAT IS YOUR GREATEST WEAKNESS? I'm deathly afraid of failure. 

IF YOU COULD BUILD A HOUSE ANYWHERE WHERE WOULD IT BE? Somewhere in the mountains of Colorado.    It would be tiny, with a big, safe yard for my kitties.  Close to Denver and close to my parents. 

WHAT'S YOUR FAVOURITE ARTICLE OF CLOTHING? My dad's old constellation t-shirt.  I love that thing

BEACH, MOUNTAINS OR CITY? Right now, I miss the beach.  But always the mountains.  Always.  The city when living.

TECHNOLOGY OR ART? Always art

COMEDY OR HORROR? These days, comedy.

FAVOURITE PHYSICAL FEATURE OF THE OPPOSITE SEX? Teeth and arms...it also seems that height is starting to matter, I'm sure that will pass

FAVOURITE TIME OF DAY? Whenever I get home

THE LAST CD YOU BOUGHT? The Beatles' White Album

WHAT'S YOUR FAVOURITE PLACE TO BE MASSAGED? back, or head

WHAT'S MOST IMPORTANT, STRONG IN MIND OR STRONG IN BODY? Mind.  Mind....really, this is a question.

WHAT TIME DO YOU WAKE UP IN THE MORNING? between 7-8....I'm sad that won't be lasting much longer...go away 6am:(

WHAT'S YOUR FAVOURITE KITCHEN ITEM?  Haha, the microwave:)

WHAT MAKES YOU REALLY ANGRY?  Ignorance

WHICH DO YOU PREFER, SPORTS CAR OR SUV? Bhelch...SUV

DO YOU BELIEVE IN AFTERLIFE? I'm not sure. I'd like to; the alternative is too depressing

WHAT IS YOUR FAVOURITE SEASON?  Hmm, winter...but, really I appreciate every season when it's time

IF YOU COULD HAVE ONE SUPER POWER, WHAT WOULD IT
BE? Charisma...really, that should be a super power

DO YOU HAVE A TATTOO, WHAT IS IT?  I have 3...I want 2 more.  I have: lord, it takes a lonley one to wish that she had never dreamt at all, on my side, seek truth on my hip, and a star on my back.

CAN YOU JUGGLE?  I cannot

WHAT IS YOUR FAVOURITE DAY? Sunday.  Always Sunday.  Maybe someday I'll get weekends off..

WHICH DO YOU PREFER SUSHI OR HAMBURGER? Sushi.  Always sushi.

WHAT'S YOUR FAVOURITE SOAP? haha...I have no idea

WHAT IS YOUR FAVOURITE MEAL? I'm craving Little India right now

IF YOU COULD TAKE A VACATION ANYWHERE IN THE WORLD
WHERE WOULD IT BE? Italy

I wonder how much I've changed...

Juice, it's what's for dinner

Smoothies, not juice.

My juicing did not go as planned. I lasted about eight hours drinking, what turned out to be shakes. I don't have the self control, or perhaps the drive, to just drink things for three days--or one day.

However, it was not a complete failure. I've continued to drink shakes, and they help my digestive system immensely. I'm almost pooping daily now. Almost. And I do feel better.

Mostly I just put a ton of spinach and kale in the shake, a frozen banana--or two, some almond butter (or dark chocolate almond butter). I've bought some other frozen fruits to add, fresh berries are too expensive. If I ever get to whole foods I will get some protein powder. But, I haven't done that. Sometimes I get serious fits of wanting to throw up, and I've been told it's probably because I'm dumping sugar into my body and I'm getting hyper-glycemic. Something like that, anyway.

The shakes are always green, rarely look appetizing. But, for the most part taste great. I'm the least healthy person in the whole world when it comes to my diet....but, I'll work on that.

I was a bit afraid this was going to cause me to gain weight, because of all the sugar and carbs, but I've actually lost two pounds. I think it's from the pooping.

So, that's that.

:)

Also, I quit my other job.

Let me tell you, having a day off does a lot for mental breakdowns. I'm still a terrible person, and deserve a good punch in the face 62% of the time....but I'm better.

I still haven't started exercising........ooopsies.

It's November--and I'm thankful

Today and everyday I am thankful for:

-my two beautiful parents
-my three brothers, who are generally more beautiful than me
-my two perfect sister's-in-law, who are always more beautiful that me--and who have become my best friends
-my perfect boyfriend, who treats me far better than I deserve
-my cousin, Mary, who is far smarter and more beautiful than me
-my entire extended family
-all my friends, even if you're not related to me
-every animal in the whole wide world...even mountain lions
-Colorado, and its beautiful weather
-I am thankful for the outdoors
-my car, who gets treated like actual poop, but continues to drive down the road
-Christmas
-seasons
-the Harry Potter series, Mists of Avalon, Beach Music, and every book I've ever read
-music
-good food
-Indian food
-the fashion world
-being born in America
-being raised to understand that just because I was born in America, I am no better than anyone born in any other country
-science
-batman onesies
-my job, and the people I work with
-chocolate
-the chance to dream
-my parents' beautiful house, and the house next door to them that they let me live in

I'm thankful for everything and anything that has helped me become the person I am today. I'm a lucky person who is spoiled by everyone in my life. And I am thankful for that.

I'm thankful for fluffy things. Like cats. And dogs. And skunks.

Indeed, balance. Needed.

I have had several mental break downs in the last month and a half and I have had enough. I can't remember if I said in my last post, but I have taken another job, at a salon (I'll go into that in another post most likely), I am still working at the jewelry store, and I'm going to school. And I'm tired. Sorry if that is repetitive, but I don't care. I'm tired.

I'm tired of waking up and barely making it to the shower (sometimes not making it to the shower and still going to work). I'm tired of having zero energy. I'm tired of going to bed at 8 o'clock. I'm tired of my clothes not fitting. I'm tired of being a bitch to the people I love. I'm tired of having zero energy to do anything when my boyfriend is in town. I'm tired.

I'm just tired.

And I have finally had enough. 

So, here was my last delicious, deliciously unhealthy meal, for a while. I read a blog about juicing, and the girls at the salon are constantly doing some new health fad......so, because the girl at xojane.com did not seem insane or obnoxiously "going with the trend" I have decided to try. 

Boyfriend convinced me to buy a nutribullet and so begins my first journey into the cooking land. Ya, I don't cook. I microwave. And I only microwave if everything is premade and ready for me to stick in the microwave. The most I have ever done is boil some eggs. When I'm healthy I eat a lot of eggs and almonds and cheese and clementines and bananas. When I am unhealthy (like now) I eat a lot of easy mac and Little India and McDonalds and anything else easy, greasy, and delicious. I never cook anything. And I know you may not think of blending as cooking, but I don't want to hear about it. If you know me, you understand. If you don't understand. I am sorry.  I went to the store and didn't have to ask anyone anything--other than for a lb of cashews, which I had to do. I ended up spending around $100 dollars, but to be fair I didn't have anything. I had to buy absolutely everything on the list and had no patience to look for the best deal--going back to being tired.....keep your thoughts to yourself (I can keep complaining about my money issues all I want)

It probably only took me an hour to get these babies done....however, it felt like forever. But, I only messed up one recipe.....that makes me proud. But, I probably messed them up more than I've reliased. but I don't care. Also, I'm doing it a little differently than the post I read. But we'll see how I feel at the end of it. 

I am going to try to do this for sure for three days (I bought six days worth of shake groceries). Day four there are halloween parties and we'll see how I feel. Then I want to start drinking shakes for breakfast. I will start exercising on Sunday. I would start now....but I want to see how this stuff makes me feel. Wish me luck. I'll let you know. 

Finding Balance**

It's now fall; there is snow in the weather for tomorrow. And life is a moving.

I'm back in school. I set my schedule up a little differently this semester. I have classes on Tuesday's and Thursday's and do not work on those days. I also took one weekend class, which is over. Thank the Baby J.

I like not having to work on Tuesday's and Thursday's, but my bank account is less than a fan.

So, here is my life:

Sometime around last spring I decided to stop being financially responsible and I am now having to deal with those choices.

Life is great right now; and then I look at my bank account. I have taken a second job to try to deal with those woes. It doesn't make me happy.

I'm trying to get back into work out mode, which is going decently well. But, boy, do I love incredibly unhealthy food. Sooooooo, ya.

So here it is:  I have two jobs, go to school full time, and am working on being healthy again.

I'm still alive and still happy.

James lives in Houston. I miss him.

I'll do a better update.......someday. No promises it'll be soon.






Also, I miss Neville. 

The Summer.

It's fall. I failed, yet again, to keep you updated on my life.

My summer was perfect. It was possibly one of the more difficult summers of my life, for several reasons. But, not worth talking about. As a whole, it was perfect. The kind of summer I would dream about.

Here's what I did:

-I spent a weekend in New York City.
-I went to Boston for the 4th of July.
-I spent a week in Albany.
-I drove to Niagara Falls. And was not disappointed.
-I spent a weekend in Pittsburgh.
-I tried to go to Albany, but got stuck in Philadelphia.
-I went back to Albany (but really it was Schenectady all along).
**I did all of this with, to see, because of my boyfriend. Oh, I also got a boyfriend. His name is James.
-I went to Missouri to visit family.
-I went to Illinois to visit family.
-I got my ear pierced with family.
-I went to both of my brother's weddings.
-I went camping.
-I barely worked.

There is an unbelievable quick summation of the adventures I had this summer. In no was does it adequately express how wonderful of a summer it was, but I hope it gives you an idea.

This collage was an absolute horror to create. I made it a while ago, in August and it took me forever today to find it. I nearly imploded. There aren't any pictures of either of the pairs of newly weds, but this is a blog about me, so I'm going to let it slide.

after all this time?

Ok, I'm going to give it a whirl.

Marriages. Weddings. Husband. Wife. Forever.

I think one of the most magical things I have ever experienced was Kaleb and Kathleen's first dance. I wasn't close to the dance floor and I really didn't have a very good view of the two of them, but "After the Storm", by Mumford and Sons came on...I think I was actually walking away from the dance floor when the song started and I turned around. And it was just....magical. The song is beautiful, and it was dusk, and I really do believe Kaleb and Kathleen love each other.

It's hard to say why my heart is turning. I don't know if it's because Kaleb's wedding has passed, Kaitlin's is coming up, and Mary's talks of engagement--do I just want to be in the same phase of life as all my favorite people? Am I wishful? Jealous? Lonely? Or just willing to believe fairytales do exist?

I know I've alluded at least once to John and my conversation over Christmas, and to sum it up, it went as such:

Katri:  Marriage is an unrealistic commitment that most people regret.

John: Marriage is hard, but worth it.

K, that is a very quick summation of how the conversation, but you get the gist of it. It's very hard for me to believe it is wise to decide you are going to spend the rest of your life with someone when you haven't even begun to live. Right now I think I do believe in marriage and do want to spend forever with someone, however I have little faith in my ability to wisely make that decision. Also, I have little faith in humanity that there is someone out there that will not bore me, or get bored of me. For some reason, in my head, marriage is the end of life. I really don't mean that to sound as morbid as it came off, but.....I'll have to continue these thoughts another day. I'm seesawing.

I just don't want to ever lose myself in somebody else.

People around me make me believe in love. Their love, if nothing else.

I mean, if Harry Potter is real, why not Love.





Also, I've just decided to underline and quote every single title, because I just don't know what I'm doing.

Thank you and goodnight.